A bit ago I was going to write and entry on how I don't know any virgins anymore, and what an odd feeling that was. Fortunately, I was super lazy, and didn't write that. I recently met the epitome of what it is to be an 18-year-old, intentional virgin. Virgins like this always have a few especially annoying trademarks.
1. They plan weddings when they're super young/it's way too soon:
So this chick, "won't judge you if you if you aren't waiting for marriage", but she totally is. This, dear readers, is because she's waiting to marry a boy she's been dating for 8 months. Oh, and it get's better, THEY'VE ALREADY GOT A DATE SET. (Can you say "Way too soon"? I bet you can!) "I just don't ever want to be with anyone else." Uhh... you don't right now.
2. They don't count "other stuff" as sex:
I would like to point out that her definition of a virgin is that she hasn't had vaginal or anal intercourse. FYI people, oral sex is sex.
3. They freak out over porn:
Everyone looks at porn besides prudes and asexuals. You shouldn't "feel like he's cheating". Is his dick in someone else? No. It's waiting forever and a fucking day to be in you. Calm down.
4. They awkwardly mention sex a lot:
Actually, if I didn't know she's a virgin this wouldn't be so noticeable. Since I do, every time she mentions anything I just want to yell "You don't even know what you're talking about! Now be quiet."
5. They say the darndest things:
(This should probably be some sort of subsection under the last point. I just really want to quote her on one thing.) "How will I know if it's bad if I've never done it before?"
For the record, the answer is: Because it will suck.
1. They plan weddings when they're super young/it's way too soon:
So this chick, "won't judge you if you if you aren't waiting for marriage", but she totally is. This, dear readers, is because she's waiting to marry a boy she's been dating for 8 months. Oh, and it get's better, THEY'VE ALREADY GOT A DATE SET. (Can you say "Way too soon"? I bet you can!) "I just don't ever want to be with anyone else." Uhh... you don't right now.
2. They don't count "other stuff" as sex:
I would like to point out that her definition of a virgin is that she hasn't had vaginal or anal intercourse. FYI people, oral sex is sex.
3. They freak out over porn:
Everyone looks at porn besides prudes and asexuals. You shouldn't "feel like he's cheating". Is his dick in someone else? No. It's waiting forever and a fucking day to be in you. Calm down.
4. They awkwardly mention sex a lot:
Actually, if I didn't know she's a virgin this wouldn't be so noticeable. Since I do, every time she mentions anything I just want to yell "You don't even know what you're talking about! Now be quiet."
5. They say the darndest things:
(This should probably be some sort of subsection under the last point. I just really want to quote her on one thing.) "How will I know if it's bad if I've never done it before?"
For the record, the answer is: Because it will suck.
6 comments:
But you weren't an 18 year old virgin! And I figured you weren't a virgin anymore! hahaha Which, btw, girl talk needs to happen.
I so LOL'D
Why would anyone wanna be a virgin anyways? It's funny too, people who aren't virgins, yet act like them. I'm in the triple digits and only regret-ish 2 of those sex encounters. Do you think virgins have a fear factor about sex or could it be a self-righteous sentiment?
Probably a bit of both. Writing off fear of sex as some sort of moral high-ground is definitely part of it.
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